What is Depression
It seems like I might be experiencing the D-word. Apparently this is very common for some one to experience after a traumatic event such as I have experienced. The problem arises from knowing how to deal with the loss. There are several components including the lose of independence and mobility. I'm a very self sufficient person and having to ask other people to help me or slow down is really hard.
I'm in the process of arranging a meeting with a psychiatrist to discuss what's going on. Hopefully I can try to figure out what’s going on with me. If any one has any recommendations for one please let me know. I was kind of expecting to go through the classic stages of grief. However that has not really happened.
Spirits Rising
The last few days have been a brutal so I'm seeking some help. I had rigged up my bike so that I would be able to ride it. This involved moving rear derailleur shifting to a bar end shifter in the end of my drop bar. Then I was able to shift both front and rear deraileurs with my left hand. This works great.
And Dashed
However I talked with the occupational therapist about it and he convinced me to not ride outside. He says, "If you fall and damage your shoulder any further there is not going to be recovery. You might as well be an amputee at that point." Fuck and just when I thought that I was going to be able to do something interesting. I guess its back to trainer and walking as my only forms of exercise. If anyone has any ideas about other forms of exercise let me know. If and when I finish the bike modifications I’ll post the pics here. For how I’m going to go try and be social even though I feel like just going home, sitting in my chair and watching TV by MYSELF.
